Well, here I am. Blogging again as promised - but I admit to being slightly dead now. Christy has been taking care of the kids in the middle of the night lately, and last night I could tell she was done. I sent her to bed at 8, and then I slept with Sammy and Elizabeth and kept them in their own room all night so Christy could sleep, peacefully, from 8pm until 5am - a rare treat. This morning she looked/sounded/felt like a new person. However, after I went nine rounds with Sammy who could probably give any kick boxer a run for his money while he sleeps - I looked and felt terrible. I can't wait to hit the sheets tonight.
I am longing for the weekend as I can just sit around, grade some students papers, do some seminary work and relax. This might be the week I buy the NFL football package again - so I can watch NFL games online. We'll see. Its 25 dollars a week (I get to watch any game I want, anytime I want, in HDTV online - if you feel like donated to the cause - let me know).
I hope everyone back in the states is doing well and can handle the ups and downs in the stock markets. I admit that its an exciting ride down here - but I'm sure its close to all consuming in the States - especially when you pile on the presidential election.
PS - How good is 'Without Remorse' by Tom Clancy and why is it not a movie?
Thursday, October 30, 2008
Saturday, October 25, 2008
12 years
Christy just came out and reminded me (wished me more like it) a happy 12-year anniversary. No - we have not been married that long...rather, October 25th is when we first started dating our senior year in highschool. We did not get married until just after college four + some years later. I know all you 'old timers' are rolling your eyes, but it none the less is striking to me. 12 years ago when we were both seniors in highschool, I blinked and somehow arrived in Costa Rica with two kids. The major difference in me is less hair and some lines by my eyes now. Time is certainly short and presious.
We were discussing 'genetically engineering' in our English class the other day at La Palabra (what else would you be discussing?) and the question was posed 'Should we do research that would help people live forever?' and also 'would you want to live forever?' Most answers were 'No, God should decide that. Plus, who would want to live forever? I don't...' I first I thought they were joking, now maybe I just think they haven't thought through the question - but everyone answered in a similar manner...."No, I'm totally ready to die at some point because being here forever would be no good at all." Am I totally alone on this one to think they are crazy? I KNOW that everyone dies, and I KNOW that if I believe what I say I would believe, I shouldn't worry. But hey, I like being here. However, here I find myself learning to have faith from the very students who I am supposed to be teaching not only English, but setting an example of a Godly life.
On this downer of a subject, I leave you a testimony that my dad sent me the other day. Its from the former press secretary, Tony Snow, and his thoughts on life and his battle with cancer.
I think I need to take more to heart both the sentiments of Mr. Snow and my students.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Tony Snow Testimony
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
'Blessings arrive in unexpected packages, - in my case, cancer. Those of us with potentially fatal diseases - and there are millions in America today - find ourselves in the odd position of coping with our mortality while trying to fathom God's will.
Although it would be the height of presumption to declare with confidence 'What It All Means,' Scripture provides powerful hints and consolations. The first is that we shouldn't spend too much time trying to answer the 'why' questions:
Why me?
Why must people suffer?
Why can't someone else get sick?
We can't answer such things, and the questions themselves often are designed more to express our anguish than to solicit an answer. I don't know why I have cancer, and I don't much care. It is what it is, a plain and indisputable fact. Yet even while staring into a mirror darkly, great and stunning truths began to take shape. Our maladies define a central feature of our existence:
We are fallen.
We are imperfect.
Our bodies give out.
But, despite this, - or because of it, -
God offers the possibility of salvation and grace.
We don't know how the narrative of our lives will end, but we get to choose how to use the interval between now and the moment we meet our Creator face-to-face.
Second, we need to get past the anxiety. The mere thought of dying can send adrenaline flooding through your system. A dizzy, unfocused panic seizes you. Your heart thumps; your head swims. You think of nothingness and swoon. You fear partings; you worry about the impact on family and friends. You fidget and get nowhere. To regain footing, remember that we were born not into death, but into life - and that the journey continues
after we have finished our days on this earth. We accept this on faith, but that faith is nourished by a conviction that stirs even within many non-believing hearts - an institution that the gift of life, once given, cannot be taken away. Those who have been stricken enjoy the special privilege of being able to fight with their might, main, and faith to live fully, richly, exuberantly - no matter how their days may be numbered.
Third, we can open our eyes and hearts. God relishes surprise. We want lives of simple, predictable ease, - smooth, even trails as far as the eye can see, - but God likes to go off-road. He provokes us with twists and turns. He places us in predicaments that seem to defy our endurance and comprehension - and yet don't. By His love and grace, we persevere.
The challenges that make our hearts leap and stomachs churn invariably strengthen our faith and grant measures of wisdom and joy we would not experience otherwise. 'You Have Been Called'. Picture yourself in a hospital bed. The fog of anesthesia has begun to wear away. A doctor stands at your feet, a loved one holds your hand at the side. 'It's cancer,' the healer announces.
The natural reaction is to turn to God and ask him to serve as a cosmic Santa. 'Dear God, make it all go away. Make everything simpler.' But another voice whispers: 'You have been called.' Your quandary has drawn you closer to God, closer to those you love, closer to the issues that matter, - and has dragged into insignificance the banal concerns that occupy our 'normal time.'
There's another kind of response, although usually short-lived, an inexplicable shudder of excitement as if a clarifying moment of calamity has swept away everything trivial and tiny, and placed before us the challenge of important questions. The moment you enter the Valley of the Shadow of Death, things change. You discover that Christianity is not something doughy, passive, pious, and soft. Faith may be the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen. But it also draws you into a world shorn of fearful caution. The life of belief teems with thrills, boldness, danger, shocks, reversals, triumphs, and epiphanies.
Think of Paul, traipsing through the known world and contemplating trips to what must have seemed the antipodes ( Spain ), shaking the dust from his sandals, worrying not about the morrow, but only about the moment. There's nothing wilder than a life of humble virtue, - for it is through selflessness and service that God wrings from our bodies and spirits the most we ever could give, the most we ever could offer, and the most we ever could do.
Finally, we can let love change everything. When Jesus was faced with the prospect of crucifixion, he grieved not for himself, but for us. He cried for Jerusalem before entering the Holy City. From the Cross, he took on the cumulative burden of human sin and weakness, and begged for forgiveness on our behalf. We get repeated chances to learn that life is not about us, that we acquired purpose and satisfaction by sharing in God's love for others.
Sickness gets us part way there. It reminds us of our limitations and dependence. But it also gives us a chance to serve the healthy. A minister friend of mine observes that people suffering grave afflictions often acquire the faith of two people, while loved ones accept the burden of two peoples' worries and fears.
'Learning How to Live'. Most of us have watched friends as they drifted toward God's arms, not with resignation, but with peace and hope. In so doing, they have taught us not how to die, but how to live. They have emulated Christ by transmitting the power and authority of live. I sat by my best friend's bedside a few years ago as a wasting cancer took him away. He kept at his table a worn Bible and a 1928 edition of the Book of Common Prayer. A shattering grief disabled his family, many of his old friends, and at least one priest.
Here was an humble and very good guy, someone who apologized when he winced with pain because he thought it made his guest uncomfortable. He restrained his equanimity and good humor literally until his last conscious moment. 'I'm going to try to beat [this cancer],' he told me several months before he died. 'But if I don't, I'll see you on the other side.'
His gift was to remind everyone around him that even though God doesn't promise us tomorrow, he does promise us eternity - filled with life and love we cannot comprehend, - and that one can, in the throes of sickness, point the rest of us toward timeless truths that will help us weather future storms. Through such trials, God bids us to choose: Do we believe, or do we not? Will we be bold enough to love, daring enough to serve, humble enough to submit, and strong enough to acknowledge our limitations? Can we surrender our concern in things that don't matter so that we might devote our remaining days to things that do?
When our faith flags, He throws reminders in our way. Think of the prayer warriors in our midst. They change things, and those of us who have been on the receiving end of their petitions and intercessions know it.
It is hard to describe, but there are times when suddenly the hairs on the back of your neck stand up, and you feel a surge of the Spirit. Somehow you just know: Others have chosen, when talking to the Author of all creation, to lift us up, - to speak of us! This is love of a very special order. But so is the ability to sit back and appreciate the wonder of every created thing. The mere thought of death somehow makes every blessing vivid, every happiness more luminous and intense.
We may not know how our contest with sickness will end, but we have felt the ineluctable touch of God. What is man that Thou are mindful of him? We don't know much, but we know this: No matter where we are, no matter what we do, no matter how bleak or frightening our prospects, each and every one of us who believe each and every day, lies in the same safe and impregnable place, in the hollow of God's hand.
T. Snow
We were discussing 'genetically engineering' in our English class the other day at La Palabra (what else would you be discussing?) and the question was posed 'Should we do research that would help people live forever?' and also 'would you want to live forever?' Most answers were 'No, God should decide that. Plus, who would want to live forever? I don't...' I first I thought they were joking, now maybe I just think they haven't thought through the question - but everyone answered in a similar manner...."No, I'm totally ready to die at some point because being here forever would be no good at all." Am I totally alone on this one to think they are crazy? I KNOW that everyone dies, and I KNOW that if I believe what I say I would believe, I shouldn't worry. But hey, I like being here. However, here I find myself learning to have faith from the very students who I am supposed to be teaching not only English, but setting an example of a Godly life.
On this downer of a subject, I leave you a testimony that my dad sent me the other day. Its from the former press secretary, Tony Snow, and his thoughts on life and his battle with cancer.
I think I need to take more to heart both the sentiments of Mr. Snow and my students.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Tony Snow Testimony
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
'Blessings arrive in unexpected packages, - in my case, cancer. Those of us with potentially fatal diseases - and there are millions in America today - find ourselves in the odd position of coping with our mortality while trying to fathom God's will.
Although it would be the height of presumption to declare with confidence 'What It All Means,' Scripture provides powerful hints and consolations. The first is that we shouldn't spend too much time trying to answer the 'why' questions:
Why me?
Why must people suffer?
Why can't someone else get sick?
We can't answer such things, and the questions themselves often are designed more to express our anguish than to solicit an answer. I don't know why I have cancer, and I don't much care. It is what it is, a plain and indisputable fact. Yet even while staring into a mirror darkly, great and stunning truths began to take shape. Our maladies define a central feature of our existence:
We are fallen.
We are imperfect.
Our bodies give out.
But, despite this, - or because of it, -
God offers the possibility of salvation and grace.
We don't know how the narrative of our lives will end, but we get to choose how to use the interval between now and the moment we meet our Creator face-to-face.
Second, we need to get past the anxiety. The mere thought of dying can send adrenaline flooding through your system. A dizzy, unfocused panic seizes you. Your heart thumps; your head swims. You think of nothingness and swoon. You fear partings; you worry about the impact on family and friends. You fidget and get nowhere. To regain footing, remember that we were born not into death, but into life - and that the journey continues
after we have finished our days on this earth. We accept this on faith, but that faith is nourished by a conviction that stirs even within many non-believing hearts - an institution that the gift of life, once given, cannot be taken away. Those who have been stricken enjoy the special privilege of being able to fight with their might, main, and faith to live fully, richly, exuberantly - no matter how their days may be numbered.
Third, we can open our eyes and hearts. God relishes surprise. We want lives of simple, predictable ease, - smooth, even trails as far as the eye can see, - but God likes to go off-road. He provokes us with twists and turns. He places us in predicaments that seem to defy our endurance and comprehension - and yet don't. By His love and grace, we persevere.
The challenges that make our hearts leap and stomachs churn invariably strengthen our faith and grant measures of wisdom and joy we would not experience otherwise. 'You Have Been Called'. Picture yourself in a hospital bed. The fog of anesthesia has begun to wear away. A doctor stands at your feet, a loved one holds your hand at the side. 'It's cancer,' the healer announces.
The natural reaction is to turn to God and ask him to serve as a cosmic Santa. 'Dear God, make it all go away. Make everything simpler.' But another voice whispers: 'You have been called.' Your quandary has drawn you closer to God, closer to those you love, closer to the issues that matter, - and has dragged into insignificance the banal concerns that occupy our 'normal time.'
There's another kind of response, although usually short-lived, an inexplicable shudder of excitement as if a clarifying moment of calamity has swept away everything trivial and tiny, and placed before us the challenge of important questions. The moment you enter the Valley of the Shadow of Death, things change. You discover that Christianity is not something doughy, passive, pious, and soft. Faith may be the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen. But it also draws you into a world shorn of fearful caution. The life of belief teems with thrills, boldness, danger, shocks, reversals, triumphs, and epiphanies.
Think of Paul, traipsing through the known world and contemplating trips to what must have seemed the antipodes ( Spain ), shaking the dust from his sandals, worrying not about the morrow, but only about the moment. There's nothing wilder than a life of humble virtue, - for it is through selflessness and service that God wrings from our bodies and spirits the most we ever could give, the most we ever could offer, and the most we ever could do.
Finally, we can let love change everything. When Jesus was faced with the prospect of crucifixion, he grieved not for himself, but for us. He cried for Jerusalem before entering the Holy City. From the Cross, he took on the cumulative burden of human sin and weakness, and begged for forgiveness on our behalf. We get repeated chances to learn that life is not about us, that we acquired purpose and satisfaction by sharing in God's love for others.
Sickness gets us part way there. It reminds us of our limitations and dependence. But it also gives us a chance to serve the healthy. A minister friend of mine observes that people suffering grave afflictions often acquire the faith of two people, while loved ones accept the burden of two peoples' worries and fears.
'Learning How to Live'. Most of us have watched friends as they drifted toward God's arms, not with resignation, but with peace and hope. In so doing, they have taught us not how to die, but how to live. They have emulated Christ by transmitting the power and authority of live. I sat by my best friend's bedside a few years ago as a wasting cancer took him away. He kept at his table a worn Bible and a 1928 edition of the Book of Common Prayer. A shattering grief disabled his family, many of his old friends, and at least one priest.
Here was an humble and very good guy, someone who apologized when he winced with pain because he thought it made his guest uncomfortable. He restrained his equanimity and good humor literally until his last conscious moment. 'I'm going to try to beat [this cancer],' he told me several months before he died. 'But if I don't, I'll see you on the other side.'
His gift was to remind everyone around him that even though God doesn't promise us tomorrow, he does promise us eternity - filled with life and love we cannot comprehend, - and that one can, in the throes of sickness, point the rest of us toward timeless truths that will help us weather future storms. Through such trials, God bids us to choose: Do we believe, or do we not? Will we be bold enough to love, daring enough to serve, humble enough to submit, and strong enough to acknowledge our limitations? Can we surrender our concern in things that don't matter so that we might devote our remaining days to things that do?
When our faith flags, He throws reminders in our way. Think of the prayer warriors in our midst. They change things, and those of us who have been on the receiving end of their petitions and intercessions know it.
It is hard to describe, but there are times when suddenly the hairs on the back of your neck stand up, and you feel a surge of the Spirit. Somehow you just know: Others have chosen, when talking to the Author of all creation, to lift us up, - to speak of us! This is love of a very special order. But so is the ability to sit back and appreciate the wonder of every created thing. The mere thought of death somehow makes every blessing vivid, every happiness more luminous and intense.
We may not know how our contest with sickness will end, but we have felt the ineluctable touch of God. What is man that Thou are mindful of him? We don't know much, but we know this: No matter where we are, no matter what we do, no matter how bleak or frightening our prospects, each and every one of us who believe each and every day, lies in the same safe and impregnable place, in the hollow of God's hand.
T. Snow
Tuesday, October 21, 2008
Oh yea, I have a blog
So, to be honest that statement above is not entirely truthly. I've REMEMBERED that I have a blog. Also, many of you have reminded me. However, in the very small amount of free time that I have I'd usually rather be relaxing, working on covenant school work, playing with my kids, exercising or just about anything but blogging. When you have so little free time, its hard to give it up doing something that can often times be mini yelling sessions at blogger while trying ot arrange pictures. Also, I honestly think that my first forray into teaching has been so frustrating (at times) that if I bring out the usual sarcastic Josh in writing blogs - it could turn into a whine session which would not be good for you guys or for me. All that aside, I think I'm ready to begin again in ernest - so I here I am tonight.
So much has happened sense the last time I wrote anything. Can you believe its been so long. I can not. The first (and probably most important) thing that many of you missed was my birthday. Fear not you late folks, I'm still excepting gifts whenever you would like to send them. I only expect 2x th
e gift for each month you have failed to send me anything. Although Christy and I are notoriously bad at taking pictures to 'capture the moment' I do have a few from this day. Once again, Christy put me to shame by making a better cake then I ever make her as well as buying m
ore thoughtful gifts then I can dream up. I'm so grateful to have her as my wife - and so grateful that she is quick to forgive after I forget (I've actually only done that once) her birthday. The picture with Sammy is my new favorite with him and is now my desktop. I like the one with Elizabeth as well as its a good action shot. Lastly, in the shot with Christy and I - us being the only people we trust with our camera in our family of four - we took our own picture. The flash didn't go off and the picture is not centered - but the slight craziness of that picture reflects how our life is right now I think.
Well we were driving back I got to experience many new '1sts'.
1. I had my car break down on the highway
So much has happened sense the last time I wrote anything. Can you believe its been so long. I can not. The first (and probably most important) thing that many of you missed was my birthday. Fear not you late folks, I'm still excepting gifts whenever you would like to send them. I only expect 2x th
e gift for each month you have failed to send me anything. Although Christy and I are notoriously bad at taking pictures to 'capture the moment' I do have a few from this day. Once again, Christy put me to shame by making a better cake then I ever make her as well as buying m
ore thoughtful gifts then I can dream up. I'm so grateful to have her as my wife - and so grateful that she is quick to forgive after I forget (I've actually only done that once) her birthday. The picture with Sammy is my new favorite with him and is now my desktop. I like the one with Elizabeth as well as its a good action shot. Lastly, in the shot with Christy and I - us being the only people we trust with our camera in our family of four - we took our own picture. The flash didn't go off and the picture is not centered - but the slight craziness of that picture reflects how our life is right now I think.My parents were in town last week to spend some time with us. It was great as it was a week off (more or less) from La Palabra - so we had some time to just spend with them. First of all, big props as they brought down the maximum limit of luggage, packed to the brim, with stuff for us. It was a little odd that they wore the same clothes everyday, but then I had to remember that the rest of their bags were filled with stuff for us. I'd say at least 50% of this was gifts for the kids - lucky dogs. Even though this was the case - of course Elizabeth said 'Where are more gifts?' after opening the last one. They got Christy and I the new NLT study Bible additions which are great. At first I did not think they were too different then my old study Bible - but I was wrong. It is much more 'academic' in the approach of what information they give you. I love the book introductions and also how they give information on translation descrepencies and other things like that.
W
e spent some time here in San Jose showing them our lives at La Palabra, our old lives on the other side of town in San Francisco de Dos Rios, and just hanging out. We also spent three days out at the beach. We decided to go to Punteranus at the old Fiesta Resort. To be honest, the beach in Punteranus is really ugly. Its at the opening of a bay, so basically nothing gets washed out once it gets washed in, so there are logs, sticks, dirt, trash, etc on the beach. However, the hotel was amazing as it was huge, the food was amazing and it had about seven pools. The only major down side was the tropical storm that was passing through during our whole time there. I've included a picture of a tormenta so you could see what it looks like - the only difference between this one and what wewere experiencing is that we saw nothing but clouds, no clear skies. It literally rained for about 55 hours straight - awesome. All that aside, we had fun anyway. Lizzy and I would swim until her faced started turning blue - after which we would run upstairs and take a hot bath. The adults got some good card playing in - and the kids got to watch the new Veggie Tale and some Bob the Builder - everyone had a great time. The only downer on my trip was that I was hoping to have more time to study covenant and Spanish - but it just did not happen. Honestly, it was more my motivation then anything else, but we will blame it on that today.
e spent some time here in San Jose showing them our lives at La Palabra, our old lives on the other side of town in San Francisco de Dos Rios, and just hanging out. We also spent three days out at the beach. We decided to go to Punteranus at the old Fiesta Resort. To be honest, the beach in Punteranus is really ugly. Its at the opening of a bay, so basically nothing gets washed out once it gets washed in, so there are logs, sticks, dirt, trash, etc on the beach. However, the hotel was amazing as it was huge, the food was amazing and it had about seven pools. The only major down side was the tropical storm that was passing through during our whole time there. I've included a picture of a tormenta so you could see what it looks like - the only difference between this one and what wewere experiencing is that we saw nothing but clouds, no clear skies. It literally rained for about 55 hours straight - awesome. All that aside, we had fun anyway. Lizzy and I would swim until her faced started turning blue - after which we would run upstairs and take a hot bath. The adults got some good card playing in - and the kids got to watch the new Veggie Tale and some Bob the Builder - everyone had a great time. The only downer on my trip was that I was hoping to have more time to study covenant and Spanish - but it just did not happen. Honestly, it was more my motivation then anything else, but we will blame it on that today. Well we were driving back I got to experience many new '1sts'.
1. I had my car break down on the highway2. I had to use the Costa Rican insurance company hotline (INS)
3. I had to try and explain, in spanish, that my car had no collant and was burning up. (I think the direct translation was 'The tank in my car for liquid that makes cold broken, car hot, FIRE!') Whatever I said they must have believed me as they sent a tow truck and a taxi.
4. I rode in a towtruck that was about the same size as the car that it was towing.
5. I helped (okay, watched) my friend replace the collant tank in my car
For your pleasure, I've attached a picture of the old tank in here so you can see what happened. You usually think there might be a small little crack in something like this, but oh no. Look at that picture and you can see the fracture running the whole length of the tank. My engine temperature went from cool to above red line in 30 seconds. The thing that I am so greatful for us that there was a 20 minute stop with traffic/construction (very common in Costa Rica) that gave me both the time and the patience to get out of my car, look for a problem and notice there was one. My friend said its good that I noticed the engine temp gauge as most people don't even look at it. He also said if I had driven on it - I would have destroyed my engine (few!)
To leave you all with today, I have a few shots of La Palabra de Vida where Christy and I are now. These shots are a bit heavy on the library because I originally took them for a work team that is coming down from my Church in Richmond, VA. However, I did include some other shots as well.
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